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@Yohannen: selfish little rock
that's how I know it's noisegrind
1. the mix: you clearly used a DAW to make this which is fine, but your plugins and soundfonts have that "stock" feel if that makes sense. find some sound fonts and VSTs that you like and experiment with audio filters too.
2. the instruments: this is more of a personal thing but i think a glock would be perfect here. experiment with other instruments like the violin, horns, bells, triangles etc.
3. the length: the song feels too long with a single melody repeating for *4 minutes*. either reduce the length or add more sections.
these are the most major issues in my opinion but the song can definitely be improved in other ways too. just fuck around and see what sticks. if you havent learned music theory then learn it.
the song has that 7th/8th gen nintendo vibe to it if that makes sense, so take a look at their music from their consoles like the Wii, Wii U and 3DS. good luck, buddy!